24 Hours At A Time

2 years ago this month, I was insane. Or as close to insane as you can get without really being crazy. After 6 years of living in Chicago Heights, IL, my dream of moving to Florida to live closer to my daughters was coming true. I had a job offer in Jacksonville, and I took it and moved.
Things moved quickly when I got to Florida. I found an apartment, got moved in, and got my youngest daughter Megan enrolled in school. She also moved in with me; the most awesome benefit of the move. I went through my new job orientation and started my first day of work. My daughter started school. I loved my apartment, and I took care of everything. Except for my alcoholism. My Program was on the backburner. The stress of starting a new job at 40 was great. So was adjusting to new surroundings. If there was any time in my life that I needed AA, it was then. By the time I started to crave alcohol, it was too late. After 3 solid days of drinking, the job, my daughter, and my dream were gone.
I ended up back in my hometown in Indiana; in complete disbelief of what I had done. I sank into an indescribable depression, with many relapses and no hope in my life. It was pretty much like that for 1 1/2 years, until finally at the 1st of this year I went to a 28 day rehab house. I made it through rehab and went on to graduate from several follow-up recovery classes. I now have 7 1/2 months of clean time.
The biggest aid to my sobriety besides rehab itself was that I quit asking why. Why did I fail in Florida? Why didn't I stay in Chicago? How the hell did I end up back in Terre Haute, IN? The bottom line was that I am where I am, and alcohol was killing me. I decided to turn my life over to a God of my understanding and work the program. I am getting into service work, working on my 4th step, and improving my physical health. I am blooming where God planted me. And when the time is right, I WILL live by my girls again. I want to be a good father, a good sponsor, a good son, and a good friend to whomever needs one. But first and foremost, I want to be a good Christian and to stay sober. I want to bloom where I was planted.-Frosty